I heard about this article on the radio and then went to see it on the website. You can translate it in your own language. It's in French.
https://fr.le360.ma/societe/tous-les-hommes-divorces-sont-ils-des-pervers-narcissiques_BNXB4OJ7SRAHVMQTWYJMJZ3BJM/
*离异男性都是自恋型人格障碍吗？**
* 优点：准确传达原意，符合中文新闻标题中立、客观的设问风格。
（为便于中文读者理解，部分表述已进行文化适配处理）
【社会观察】两个悄然渗透我们生活的词汇
作者：苏玛雅·纳阿曼·格苏斯
2025年11月14日 12:13
"自恋型人格障碍"（Pervers Narcissique）这个词组正悄然渗透进我们的日常——闺蜜间的私语、社交媒体的倾诉、自我成长类视频乃至分手故事中。它似乎能解释所有痛苦：恋情失败、精神虐待。但当这个术语变得泛滥时，其背后复杂的真相往往被简化，心理学概念与现实体验之间产生了错位。
**专业概念的世俗化**
该术语源于精神分析学，指代那些通过支配、操纵和摧毁他人来满足病态自恋的个体。他们吸食受害者的精神能量，摧毁其自信，扭曲其对现实的认知。这种精神操控关系确实构成严重的心理暴力，但临床诊断的典型案例其实非常罕见。
**当痛苦需要命名**
在互联网推波助澜下，这个专业术语正在被泛化。许多女性在经历情感创伤后，倾向于用"遇上了自恋型人格障碍"来定义整段关系。有时确是如此，但更多时候，这成为她们为真实痛苦寻找载体的方式——当深爱的人始终不愿理解、尊重或看见自己时，心理学术语成了精神救生筏。危险在于，当专业术语取代深度思考，任何造成情感伤害的伴侣都可能被贴上这个标签。
**权力结构中的集体呐喊**
这个术语的流行折射出女性共同的困境。在太多亲密关系中，权力不对等、暴力沟通和社会压力始终存在。当女性感到自我价值被否定时，"自恋型人格障碍"变成一种抗争："他摧毁了我"。这并非临床诊断，而是对尊严的呐喊。
**非黑即白的陷阱**
但必须明确：冷漠、自私或沟通障碍不等同于病态自恋。很多人只是情感不成熟、缺乏表达爱的能力，或带着童年创伤在关系中挣扎。临床心理学严格区分这些情况与真正的病态自恋——后者以持续缺乏共情的刻意操纵为特征。将两者混为一谈，实则是将人性的复杂平面化。
**社交媒体的推波助澜**
当情感博主们未经专业训练就大肆给出简单诊断，这个严肃术语正在沦为分手战场上的武器。指责对方是"自恋型人格障碍"，往往成为拒绝沟通的快捷方式。
**重建对话空间**
需要清醒认识到：
- 难相处的伴侣不一定是操纵者
- 意见分歧不等同于精神暴力
- 所有痛苦都值得被正视，但未必需要临床诊断来背书
健康的亲密关系是两颗灵魂的温柔相遇，而非施害者与受害者的角斗场。当关系走向终结，真正的疗愈始于停止用流行术语解释伤痛，转而勇敢审视这段经历揭示的自我真相。
【延伸探讨】病态自恋者能治愈吗？
这涉及深层人格障碍，通常根植于童年期的情感缺失或自尊创伤。这类人格的防御机制建立在持续支配他人之上。由于缺乏共情能力，治疗过程漫长且效果存疑。
确有部分人通过系统心理治疗获得改善，但这需要他们首先承认对他人造成的伤害——这对缺乏自省能力的人群而言本就艰难。更多具有自恋特质（非病态）的群体，则完全可以通过治疗学会尊重边界、看见他人。
在持续存在操控的关系中，受害者最紧要的是重建自我价值体系，而非期待对方改变。
**最后的警示**
确实存在真正的病态自恋者：精于操纵、情感冰冷、能缓慢摧毁他人自尊的个体。但我们也不该将每个难以相处的伴侣都妖魔化。
健康的关系需要双向调整，有毒的关系则是一方不断膨胀而另一方逐渐消失。
核心议题从来不是随意贴标签，而是学会辨识关系中的毒性成分——无论来自对方，还是源于自身。
（编译注：为符合中文阅读习惯，对原文段落结构及修辞进行了重组，保留核心论述的同时强化了逻辑递进关系）
:
**"Are all divorced men narcissistic perverts?"**
**[Social Observation] Two Words That Have Quietly Infiltrated Our Lives**
Author: Su Maya Na'aman Gesus
November 14, 2025, 12:13 PM
The term "narcissistic personality disorder" (*Pervers Narcissique*) is quietly infiltrating our daily lives—whispered among close friends, discussed on social media, featured in self-help videos, and even mentioned in breakup stories. It seems to explain all kinds of pain: failed relationships, emotional abuse. But as this term becomes more widespread, the complex truths behind it are often oversimplified, leading to a disconnect between psychological concepts and real-life experiences.
### **The Secularization of Professional Concepts**
This term originates from psychoanalysis and refers to individuals who satisfy their pathological narcissism by dominating, manipulating, and destroying others. They feed off their victims' mental energy, destroying their self-confidence and distorting their perception of reality. This kind of psychological manipulation constitutes serious emotional violence, but clinical cases of this type are actually very rare.
### **When Pain Needs a Name**
Fueled by the internet, this professional term is becoming more generalized. Many women, after experiencing emotional trauma, tend to label their entire relationship as "narcissistic personality disorder." Sometimes this may be true, but more often, it becomes a way for them to give voice to their real pain—when the person they loved refuses to understand, respect, or even see them, psychological terminology becomes a lifeline. The danger is that when these technical terms replace deep reflection, any partner causing emotional harm may be labeled with this term.
### **A Collective Outcry Within Power Structures**
The popularity of this term reflects the shared predicament of women. In too many intimate relationships, there is always an imbalance of power, violent communication, and societal pressure. When women feel that their self-worth is denied, "narcissistic personality disorder" becomes a form of resistance: "He destroyed me." This is not a clinical diagnosis but a cry for dignity.
### **The Trap of Black-and-White Thinking**
However, it is crucial to clarify: indifference, selfishness, or communication difficulties are not the same as pathological narcissism. Many people are simply emotionally immature, lack the ability to express love, or are struggling with childhood trauma in their relationships. Clinical psychology strictly distinguishes these cases from true pathological narcissism, which is characterized by deliberate manipulation and a continuous lack of empathy. Conflating the two reduces the complexity of human nature into a flat, simplistic view.
### **The Role of Social Media**
When emotional bloggers, untrained in the field, give simple diagnoses, this serious term is being reduced to a weapon in breakup battles. Accusing someone of having "narcissistic personality disorder" often becomes a shortcut to avoiding communication.
### **Rebuilding the Space for Dialogue**
It is important to recognize that:
* A difficult partner is not necessarily a manipulator.
* Disagreements do not equal emotional violence.
* All pain deserves recognition, but not every situation needs a clinical diagnosis to validate it.
Healthy intimate relationships are about the gentle meeting of two souls, not a battleground between victim and perpetrator. When a relationship ends, real healing begins when we stop using trendy terms to explain our pain and instead courageously examine the truths about ourselves that the experience reveals.
### **Extended Discussion: Can Narcissistic Personality Disorder Be Cured?**
This involves deep-seated personality disorders, usually rooted in emotional neglect or self-esteem wounds in childhood. The defensive mechanisms of such personalities are built on the continuous domination of others. Due to a lack of empathy, the treatment process is lengthy and its effectiveness is uncertain.
Some individuals do experience improvement through systematic psychological therapy, but this requires them to first acknowledge the harm they have caused to others—a difficult task for those with little self-reflection ability. More people with narcissistic traits (but not pathological) can completely learn to respect boundaries and see others through therapy.
In relationships with ongoing manipulation, the victim's primary focus should be on rebuilding their own sense of self-worth, rather than expecting the other person to change.
### **Final Warning**
Indeed, there are genuine pathological narcissists: those who are skilled manipulators, emotionally cold, and capable of slowly destroying others' self-esteem. But we should not demonize every difficult partner.
Healthy relationships require mutual adjustment, while toxic relationships are marked by one party constantly expanding while the other disappears.
The core issue is never about labeling someone casually but learning to identify the toxic elements in a relationship—whether they come from the other person or from within ourselves.
